28 in 2019.

It's officially a new year for me as I turn 28 in 2019. It was a meaningful 2018. It was tough, but I needed it. I don't want to celebrate my birthday today. Or this week. Or this weekend.

I want to celebrate my birthday for the whole year.

How do I want to celebrate? 

I want to feel free as I navigate through life. I want to find hope in my relationships and myself. I want to laugh and dance and create and appreciate and cry and grow. 

I want to be myself but who am I? 

I want to trust. 

I want to relinquish expectations and live back in the present (←that's an oxymoron). 

I want to want less but do more. I will want less and do more. 

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Why?  How? What?

Sleep with more consistency.

Eat with more consciousness.

Love with less attachment. Love with less rules.

Dance with more emotion. Dance with more happiness. 

Sing with your heart.

Think less. Sit less. Do.

Get to work between 8am and 10am.

More frequent and small meals. Drink more water. Have fun cooking healthy. Less meat to no meat.

I love them as them. I accept them and I give them space. I don't control what they do or say or feel.

Straw hat man at Silver Room Block Party. Orange shirt teen at Pitchfork. Young, tall Hapa at Chicago SummerDance House at the Taste. That'll be me in 5 years. Markus pe Benito. 

Metric. Joe Purdy. 

Talk to friends. Hangout with friends. Exercise. Yoga with Karen. African dance. Steezy. 3 dance playlist. Blogger. Bike. Run. Walk. Speedwalk. Jog. Stretch. Strengthen. Journal. Read. Write. Draw. Make videos. Chill. Stranger Things 3. Vongo vs. Hoka One. Organize files. CEUs. Glasses.
Ukelele play & sing. Recycle. Compost. Donate clothes. 

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Henry, thank you for helping me get this far. I know it's still a long road ahead. It's okay to feel lonely. You are not alone. It's okay to have insecurities. It's okay to be far less than perfect. It's okay because you are human. Thank you for trying to understand me. Thank you for helping me understand myself more. Thank you for your persistence and drive. Thank you for your patience. Thank you for being brave. Thank you for taking care of me -- for taking care of yourself. You are a priority. You've come so far and I recognize your struggles and your sacrifices. You care about me. You care about others. You have a big heart. Listen for it. Listen to it. Your past self is part of you, but you are not bound by him. He is not the present-you. The present-you is different and that's OK. 

I listen to you.

I care about you.

I love you.

Happy birthday, Henry.